DELICIOUS AMBIGUITY

I spent time yesterday searching online for a new job. I don't hate the job I have, but I often feel that I should be doing something else, something that influences people, inspires them, something that can change the world. So let's look at that statement-change the world. The first thing you have to do is define what "the world" is. Should I honestly expect that my actions will effect some person in New Delhi or Paris or Knoxville for that matter? And if I do, how will I know that I was successful? I don't know anyone in any of those places. I think your world is any place where there is someone whom you know personally. Why? Because if you set the lofty goal of changing the world and envision that world as being the entire globe, you will inevitably be disappointed. How can you know that your actions have truly effected that person in New Delhi or Paris or Knoxville. Does that mean that we shouldn't be concerned with any of those people. Absolutely not! If donating time or money to charities makes you feel good than by all means, do it. Because that's how I think we can change the world, our own personal worlds-by doing what we can to be happy. If I'm happy I can share that with my family and friends. And they will share it with their family and friends. And so on. Until it eventually reaches New Delhi, or Paris, or Knoxville.

What happened yesterday was a brief lapse in enjoying the moment. Do I wish I had a different job? Sure, but if I focus on that and forget to enjoy life for what it is-moments, my world will become stagnant and nothing will change. I have to welcome each moment because that's all we have. The future will always be the future and my past is always growing, but now is something I may never have if I don't embrace it for everything that it is.

So right now, I'm going to go enjoy a bagel and some coffee and look at the beautiful day outside. I hope your now is just as good.

• "I wanted the perfect ending. Now I've learned, the hard way, that some poems don't rhyme, and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle, and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next. Delicious ambiguity." -Gilda Radner