A STEP TOWARD CHANGE?

On the first day after such a strong message was sent across the country, I feel it necessary to share some wisdom. Am I happy? Of course. I didn't want to leave this country. But am I optimistic for the future? Well...let's face it, I've become somewhat cynical over the years and am realistic. Can one person change all our woes? I doubt it, but it is definitely a step in a different direction that, I hope, will be better. Only time will tell. So here is what other people have said about politics. Perhaps there is enlightenment within these words (or at least a chuckle or two):

• Politics, it seems to me, for years, or all too long, has been concerned with right or left instead of right or wrong. ~Richard Armour
• Hell, I never vote for anybody, I always vote against. ~W.C. Fields
• Those who are too smart to engage in politics are punished by being governed by those who are dumber. ~Plato
• Liberalism is trust of the people tempered by prudence. Conservatism is distrust of the people tempered by fear. ~William E. Gladstone, 1866
• When I was a boy I was told that anybody could become President; I'm beginning to believe it. ~Clarence Darrow
• A conservative is a man with two perfectly good legs who, however, has never learned how to walk forward. ~Franklin D. Roosevelt, radio speech, 26 October 1939
• Conservative, n: A statesman who is enamored of existing evils, as distinguished from the Liberal who wishes to replace them with others. ~Ambrose Bierce, The Devil's Dictionary

And finally...I don't think this is what Obama meant by change, but I think it fits:

• Politicians are like diapers. They both need changing regularly and for the same reason. ~Author Unknown

IS ANYBODY THERE?
DOES ANYBODY CARE?

I would not be surprised if I've lost each of the two(?) readers I had. Sorry that I've been so neglectful. To be honest, I've probably had lots to say, yet it's very difficult to do when I only get online once a week at most. When you have a view like this you may understand why I don't see the need to stare at a computer screen.
Things are going as well as can be expected. I still suffer from the un's (see the entry for April 14th if you are wondering what it is), but again it seems futile to wallow in anything negative when you can see sunsets like this any day. At least any day that's sunny. The past few days it's been quite gloomy and raining. I LOVE IT!!! Hopefully I'll be able to post pictures of beautiful, green hills soon. That's about the only way it can get any nicer here.
The wildlife is still plentiful. Mike and I got a visit from a 4 point buck the other day who stood and stared at us for no less than 2 or 3 minutes before wandering off. The newest discovery was a wind scorpion. I try to be patient with all the creepiness that's up here. I don't mind the tarantulas primarily because they are outside. And the lizards remind me of Florida. But this guy did NOT have to be in the house. I guess he wasn't large for his species, but he was definitely too big for my comfort.
In between shooing out all the spiders and what not, I've been reading and watching a lot of movies. I watched The Fall several weeks ago and still can't get the amazing visuals out of my head. With a good script, acting, and beautiful locations, this film is worth checking out. Role Models is the funniest film I've seen recently. I was beginning to think no one could write a funny script anymore. I finally started watching The Sopranos and am glad I did. I'm on the last season of The Wire and cherishing every moment since it will all be over soon. I finally finished listening to Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell. I found it much easier to listen to than read. I also finished David Sedaris' newest, When You Are Engulfed In Flames. I highly recommend all his books; however, for full effect check them out in audio format. It is so much more enjoyable listening to him tell his quirky stories.
Other than that, it's same old same old on the hill. Work is slowly getting busier, but the holiday season will be interesting. Gas is finally going down here. I find it ironic that it's dropped significantly right before elections-but that is a whole other blog. I did vote today and hopefully I won't have to start planning to move out of country tomorrow. If a certain old, wrinkly, white man wins, you know my ass will be leaving soon.
I'd like to promise that I will blog more often, but don't hold your breath. It's just too comfortable up on the hill and I'd rather embrace nature than drive with the loonies down here. But please check back here every so often and perhaps I'll have found something else to gab about.

MY OWN WILD KINGDOM

I must admit that the last month has been interesting. I've moved to the East hills overlooking San Jose. The view is awe-inspiring. I have yet to become tired of it. It has been extremely hot recently which makes it somewhat uncomfortable and the heat will not be easing up for the next week or so. Still, it's not enough for me to give up the beauty or all the nature happening around me. Nearly every night I am serenaded by coyotes and even heard a kill a few nights ago. That was somewhat disturbing, but it is nature up here. I find my eyes drift to the skies where I am amazed by the aero-acrobatics of various raptors. There is a huge ground spider's web right outside the front door with a tunnel that Shelob (that's what I call her) sits in regularly. There are always spiders indoors, but I prefer to move them outside where their lives and mine can be less interactive. I saw this tarantula walking on the driveway during an evening stroll. (For more images from my new home, check out my photobucket page) This was right after a wild boar growled at Mike and I because we were a little too close to where he/she was. We had no idea since she was in the brush, but a flock of wild turkeys nearby were clucking away which will be a warning the next time. There are several flocks of turkeys and Mike's collection of feathers grows nearly every day. He also went on a hike last week and discovered the bones of a cow including a gorgeous skull (I can't wait to see what piece of art he will turn it into). Deer sightings are a daily occurrence with many does, fawns, and a couple bucks (neither bigger than 4 points, but they're young I think).
The newest addition to the menagerie is a young coyote that likes the apples that have fallen to the ground. I read at a website that eating fruit is normal for them this time of year, but he still looks really sickly to me. I had a brief discussion with my neighbor yesterday and she admitted to putting out both grapes and water for it. I told her that I wasn't going to call the landlord, but after what I've read I've decided that I should. The website says that feeding them makes them more aggressive and coyote attacks on humans have increased dramatically over the past five years in CA. I'm sure she believes she's doing what's best for the creature, but that is not true. I will leave a note if I don't see her explaining that I will be calling the landlord. We all rent property from him and since this is his beef cow farm, I think he has a right to decide what happens to it. I also think she's just putting off the inevitable which seems crueler than having someone come up and shoot it since it could take some time for it to die on it's own.
What I've come to realize living here is that nature takes care of her own. I hate to see suffering as much as the next person, but nothing that happens in nature is malicious. It is just how things are. I can see how living here will help me in my own questions of existence and purpose. I'm looking forward to all the future lessons she has for me. Stay tuned and I'll try to share them as the happen.

WHAT'S BEEN HAPPENING

I'm sure my readers (all 2 or 3 of you) have been wondering how my trip was. Well, it was an adventure. An adventure that keeps haunting Mike and I in various ways. With everything that went wrong, I began to wonder if Karma wasn't trying to pay me back for something (ala "My Name Is Earl"), but I now understand that perhaps this was all a test of character. How much can I take before I completely break down. I think I passed, maybe not with an A+, but at least with a B. I don't want to dwell on the negative things that happened. That would negate the learning I did. Instead I would like to say that we were handed a lot of shit (for lack of a better word) and I didn't allow it to dampen my mood entirely. The old me would have totally freaked and ruined any enjoyment that I could have had. The new me freaked a little, absorbed what was happening, and decided to move on and seek out the positive.
I'll start by saying that Oregon and Washington are beautiful. The drive up passes near no less than 4 mountains that I could identify: Mt Shasta, Mt. Hood, Mt. Saint Helens, and Mt. Rainier. There were many more, but I didn't ask their names. The weather was great. It was a little hot the first day or two, but then it cooled off nicely. There were only two days where it threatened to rain and then it only sprinkled. We were only able to spend a couple hours in Seattle, but the ferry ride across Puget Sound was absolutely beautiful. The campground was located right on Hood Canal (an offshoot of the Sound), so we were able enjoy some time floating in the water and looking at shells. All in all, it was a great trip. I took a lot of pictures that you can see here. And though I would change many things about it, I am glad that I went. And now I have a reason to go back and see what I couldn't see the first time.
Last week my friend Amy and her family came for a visit. We spent a day at the Monterey Aquarium. It is a wonderful facility that houses several large tanks set up as habitats that use actual Bay water as well as many other exhibits. It's also next to Cannery Row which doesn't have any working canneries anymore, but does have a lot of cool shops. I took a billion pictures at the aquarium. Some are dark or blurry because I don't like to use my flash. If you're ever in this area, you have to check it out. It is one of the best aquariums.

I'M HITTIN' THE ROAD

and I can't wait. I'm finally taking a much needed vacation and heading up to Seattle. I love trips like this. Not much planned, just a destination point and a time span to work with. This is when it truly becomes all about the journey. I've never been farther north than Redding, CA and am so excited. There will be many pictures and stories to tell, so check back after next weekend and I'll have plenty of both.
All that's left to say is, "one more day, B&N, and my ass is gone for a week!"

FOR POPS, WITH LOVE

As I said in an earlier blog, it's important to share memories of people while they can enjoy them, too. So here are some memories of my father.
I remember making taffy at home. It is one of my Dad's favorite candies and there was nothing more exciting than allowing a child to smear great globs of butter on their hands!
We took long drives on Saturdays eating Smart Food (white cheese popcorn for those not familiar) and circus peanuts.
My sisters and I used to have dinner at his place on Tuesdays and watch Aquaman (a tv series I'm sure very few people remember.)
Movies have always been part of my memories and two specific ones I saw with my father were Superman and the Jessica Lange/Jeff Bridges version of King Kong.
I spent a Halloween watching him decide which child got Smarties and which got Dumdums. He thought the holiday should be fun, no matter whether you are a kid or a not.
We took a trip to St. Augustine, Fl one Thanksgiving and sat on the porch of a bar drinking beer and sharing laughs.
I'll never forget the trip to Florida that was interrupted by an overnight stay on the floor of the Detroit Int. airport. Thanks again, Marco Polo, for that one!
My father is very artistic (a trait lost with me) and I've always enjoyed watching him in his workshop turning pieces of wood into beautiful pens.
Many of my favorite things were introduced to me by him:

• the Harry Potter series which he insisted I should read and I've loved ever since
• an endless list of movies: Triplets of Belleville, Kiki's Delivery Service, Spirited Away, all the Monty Pythons (which we randomly quote to one another every time we're together)
• the tv series My Name Is Earl which is a source of endless laughs.

I am eternally grateful for everything I've shared with him and everything he has given me. All the knowledge, laughter and love I cherish forever. So on this day, determined by a card company, I would like to tell him that I love him every day. Thank you, Pops, for being you!

SPIRITED AWAY

Here's a little known fact: I love movies. Have I ever mentioned that in this blog? A great one can change a mood 180 degrees. And that's what happened tonight. I finally watched Kiki's Delivery Service and Miyazaki did it again. More kudos to you, Mr. Wonderful. I'm all ready a huge fan of his other works and have yet to find one that I think is only so-so. There's something about the combination of beautiful animation, a great story, and a strong message that I find completely mesmerizing.
This film follows Kiki, a thirteen year-old witch, as she leaves her home to pursue a year of training on her own. Anyone who knows me will know that the nomad in me screams for that. Add to that the fact that she can fly on a broom and this movie reaches in and tugs my aerial heartstrings.
SPOILER ALERT: do not read this next paragraph if you haven't seen it.
She immediately heads to the ocean and sets up a delivery service (hence the title) in a large city that is largely unfamiliar with witches. She has encounters with people who are either accepting or reticent, the former occurring more frequently than the latter; yet, she focuses on those few who are aloof and reads too much into the actions of a young man who is honestly fascinated by her. As time passes, she begins to lose her powers. Only after she learns that it is the spirit within her that has faded and she needs to rediscover it, is she able to fly again and save the young man. It was the negative thoughts that held her back. They literally weigh her down.
O.K. you can read again. Another thing I love about Miyazaki movies is the amazing heroines. He has said that he makes movies that his 10-14 year-old female relatives will enjoy, but I feel he takes it a step further. Every protagonist will struggle with inner demons and conquer them only after finding their own strengths. They may whine or complain, but they eventually work things out on their own. What an amazing moral, especially coming from a Japanese man (in his sixties no less)! And did I mention the animation. No one can create a more beautiful sky or wind-swept field except Ms. Nature herself.
If you haven't treated yourself to these masterpieces, you are missing out. And if you have, let me know what you think.

I NEED SOMETHING

This is my new favorite artist. I love his lyrics and the way he plays guitar.

ENLIGHTENMENT DRAWN FROM AN UNQUIET MIND

I just finished listening to Siddhartha. It is a beautiful story of one man's quest for peace and contentment. During his journey he exposes himself to every manner of living: first he follows the Buddhist path through meditation, learning, and asceticism; next he seeks lessons in lovemaking from a courtesan and knowledge of business and money from a successful merchant; finally, he learns empathy by embracing the son he has never known and gains enlightenment through the strength and wisdom of nature.
I found this tale to be very illuminative because (although I am an athiest) if I ever chose a religion to follow, it would be Buddhism. What fascinated my the most about this audio book was the essay included at the end. It gives the listener an idea of the mindset of Hermann Hesse when he wrote the novel. Hesse suffered all his life from depression and even attempted suicide. He sought psychotherapy and became a friend of Carl Jung, even receiving treatment from him. I find that I can connect more with Hesse than with his hero; even so far as our shared pursuits of what Siddhartha achieves.
I highly recommend this book. If you've never read it, you should. And if you have, you should listen to this audio version. Check your library. That's where I found it. And if you do, please let me know what you think.

WIRED FOR THE WIRE

I know, don't say it...this title sucks! But The Wire does not. I just started watching the HBO series and I'll admit, it didn't catch me right away. But it definitely grew on me. Now, yeah, I'm hooked. It only took the third episode. And this scene was pivotal. I'll tell you that this show takes place in the heart of Baltimore and is another cops and criminals show, but with some of the best writing around. All you really need to know about this scene is that D'Angelo is the boss and the two guys are his runners. Now sit back and watch some of the best teaching I've ever seen:

FOR MOM, WITH LOVE, PART TWO

It's sad that we never think to share favorite memories about people who are important to us until after they are gone. Case in point-my last blog. In honor of my mother's birthday, I would like to share some fond moments we have shared.
One of my mother's favorite holidays is Christmas, so I have many memories from that time of year:

• She always baked goody packages for her friends and my sisters and I were enlisted to frost dozens of sugar cookies.
• She made advent calendars out of old Christmas cards.
• She always picked the 'Charlie Brown' tree because she said no one else would pick it and the bare side could face the wall.
• While we were at school, she would put out all the Christmas decorations (leaving the tree because we always decorated it together). Upon seeing the decorations, I knew to look for several Christmas elves she had hidden in plain sight throughout the house.
• For several years, she and I made the traditional gingerbread house. The most elaborate of which was a three story mansion with field stone walls painted on with frosting (one of which we had to remake after our dog, Maggie, ate it-but that is a whole other set of memories).

She enjoyed having dinner parties and would often try unusual dishes. Once she tried to make a bombe (the ice cream desert, not the explosive device), but the ice cream was too soft so she flung the whole container into the sink. At the time things were quite tense, but now she and I laugh about it.

I remember going to Disneyland when I was 8. Everyone wanted to go in the Haunted House except me. Hello, people were screaming in there! I didn't know it was fake. Anyway, my mom told me to wait on a bench out front for them. She has since said the thought that she did that has given her chills, but I wasn't afraid at all.

On another trip to Northern Michigan, we left early because she wanted to take a scenic drive before breakfast. Long story short, my sisters and I complained endlessly because it took forever. Although I now enjoy taking them, the words scenic drive always make my stomach growl.

When I moved back home, I lived with her in her cozy 'cottage by a lake'. She had the most beautiful flower gardens. I have always envied her green thumb, a gift I was not blessed with. While living with her again, we shared many more special moments: Sunday evenings watching pbs and Mondays watching Antique Roadshow; stories about her youth I had never heard before; a wonderful dinner she cooked for my friend, Dana.

It was during this dinner that Dana pointed out something about my mother that I have always loved, even though I barely noticed it anymore. Dana heard my mom singing and commented about it. My mother is always singing, whether she is playing music or cooking or walking through the house. And I have always loved it. Her voice is so much the soundtrack to my life. She has even made up songs for us that my sisters and I remember to this day. And I am blessed with the same love of song. I don't sing nearly as much (or as well) as she does, but when a song starts playing that I love, I will belt out a few notes.

There you have it. Those are but a few of the numerous great memories I have. I am so proud to say that Marjorie Lightner is my mother. She has such a wonderful soul. And even though I live thousands of miles away, I can feel how much she loves me. Thank you, Mom, for being the person you are. I love you.

FOR YOU, MOM, WITH LOVE

My mom asked me for some memories of my grandmother (her mom) for a long-overdue memorial that she will be doing. I decided I would post them, so anyone who may read this could know.
The biggest thing I remember about my grandmother was the little things my sisters and I always did when we stayed at her house. We each had our own tea set and mug for hot chocolate. We also had our own small pitcher sets that we used to hold milk and sugar cubes. Why we put milk and sugar in hot chocolate is odd, but it was tradition. My grandmother had the biggest bed; yet, it became quite small when you had to try to fall asleep to her snoring. It became a race to beat her to sleep (something I was never able to do). She was the first person I knew to have a tv with a remote-one of the ones with 4 buttons: on/off, channel up, channel down, and volume. I can still hear the clicking sound it made. I also can still smell her house. It wasn't a bad smell, just distinguishable. And I still smell it. I remember Christmas mornings at her house. My sisters and I could choose one gift from home to bring with us and I remember bringing Candyland one year.
But the one thing I would share with someone who never knew my grandmother is that she is my hero. When she passed away, she had gone everywhere in the world she wanted to go. And she went to some pretty cool places. I remember her telling about riding a camel. She also went to the Wailing Wall in Jerusalem. Not only did she go to the wall, but she went to the men's side. She said she wanted to see if it was different. That's what I liked most about her. She always seemed fearless to me. She never seemed to let life pass her by. That's why she's my hero.

THE MOTHER OF INVENTION

I should be going to sleep right now, but I have to comment on something. I love the weather here! Two days ago it was hot-and not just for this area. It was 90 degrees! Today it barely reached 65. That is what is so cool. Sure it may be a foreboding of what's to come, but tonight there is an amazing fog rolling across the valley. It made me recognize how someone (Mr. Carpenter and Mr. King for example) could visualize this natural phenomenon as being an evil sweeping down on the 'innocent.' I speak, of course, of the movie The Fog and the story The Mist respectively. Both are prime examples of what a warped, twisted, lovely mind can come up with when given something so common and typically benign. I have not seen the recent film adaptation of the the latter and I'm not sure I want to. I have found that Hollywood does not do a good job of interpreting Stephen King's books. And despite my many gripes about his latest publications, there is nothing creepier than his old-school shit. Makes me want to reread some of it.

WALLOWING IN THE UN'S

I dreamed I was missing
You were so scared
But no one would listen
'Cause no one else cares
After my dreaming
I woke with this fear
What am I leaving?
When I'm done here
So if you're asking me I want you to know

When my time comes
Forget the one that I've done
Help me leave behind some reasons to be missed
And don't resent me
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory
Leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest

Don't be afraid
I've taken my bail
I've shed when I'm near
I'm struggling to surface
Not all the way through
I've never been perfect
But neither have you
So if you're asking me I want you to know

When my time comes
Forget the one that I've done
Help me leave behind some reasons to be missed
Don't resent me
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory
Leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest

Forgetting all the hurt inside
You've learned to have so well
Pretending someone else can come and save me
From myself
I can't be who you are

When my time comes
Forget the one that I've done
Help me leave behind some reasons to be missed
Don't resent me
And when you're feeling empty
Keep me in your memory
Leave out all the rest
Leave out all the rest

Forgetting all the hurt inside
You've learned to have so well
Pretending someone else can come and save me
From myself
I can't be who you are
I can't be who you are

Leave Out All The Rest, Linkin Park

DAMN YOU, MR. CHAVEZ!

So I have found a potential story. I'm excited about the research that I will have to do. And I was all set to start today, but all of the libraries were closed. Something about Cesar Chavez day around here. Who is this guy and why does he get a day? All I know is that his park in downtown San Jo has free concerts during the summer. O.k. So I looked up his Wikipedia page and I guess he did some pretty cool things. It would be interesting to see where he would stand with regards to GWBush's immigration groans.
This frustration leads to something else I'd like to rant about for a sec. Is it just me or does it seem like every month is 'national (insert whatever cause/minority/illness you want here) month.' This month is National Autism Awareness month. I know this because my bookstore has a display table set up and Joey Travolta (yes, John's bro) will be coming to push some book or something. I'm not going to be totally insensitive and say that this ailment doesn't deserve some recognition; however, I have two points I want to present to you, my happy readers:

• First: it seems like a lot more people are being diagnosed with some form of autism lately. Someone at work even told me about a young girl who became autistic after she received too many booster shots at one time. Huh? Are people really autistic? Or is just a way to explain different or problematic behavior. Is autism becoming the new ADHD?
• Second: do people really become more aware during these themed months? Or is this just a means to get on soap boxes and sell books. Please understand, I'm not trying to be insensitive here. But when you work in a bookstore, you learn a lot about people. And the biggest realization I've made is that humans are very much herd animals. They like to 'flock' to some cause or fad just because someone on TV said something about it. I can't tell you how many times people have spent money (sometimes lots of moolah) because (insert celebrity name here) told them they need this book/dvd/cd. I guess I shouldn't gripe too much. It does keep me employed.
  

So how many people 'remembered' Cesar Chavez today? Who knows. Inevitably, this 'holiday' will grow to have the same meaning as all the rest: just another day that people can't go to the library/post office/bank.

WHAT I WANT...

So I was rereading my last post and I realized something. Of the four movie quotes I listed, three are from original scripts. My problem with writing a screenplay is that I want to write lines like those. They are truly amazing. And I try so hard to create that one line that will capture everything, that it cripples me. I learned somewhere that that is the one thing you (as a screenwriter) should never do. But it is nearly impossible for me to follow. Let's face it. Anyone who is a movie fan like me can recite some line from a movie, or knows a great monologue. Lines as simple as, "I'll be back," or "Frankly, my dear, I don't give a damn," or whole speeches like Marlon Brando's "I coulda been a contendah," or Al Pacino's amazing homage to everything evil in "The Devil's Advocate." I would love to be standing somewhere and overhear someone quoting something I had written.
What I need to do is start a new script. I have a few ideas, but both require a ton of research. One I have begun research on and one I have only a vague idea for, but that I think could be very interesting. What I need to do is get off my ass and do something. So that's my challenge. I will take any encouragement or help I can get. But inevitably, I need to do it. Stay tuned...I'll keep you informed.

BLISSFUL MELANCHOLY

This will be the third time I've tried to write this blog. I'm having a hard time finding the words to express my feelings at the moment. In fact, screw it! I don't want to. I found a movie quotes site that's pretty cool, so I'll just use other people's words again. And I'll share this picture I took a while back when the waves were crazy. I'm hoping to go see some pretty flowers on Wednesday. Maybe I'll post some pics from that.

• "Me, I didn't mean anything. About anything, to anyone. And I knew that guaranteed me a long, depression-free life." About A Boy
• "Nothing is more necessary than the unnecessary." Life Is Beautiful
• "Vice, virtue, it's best not to be too moral - you cheat yourself out of too much life. Aim above morality." Harold And Maude
• "...you finally hit bottom, and you realize that you can't go any lower. When you find a friend you wouldn't have found anywhere else.... sometimes you see the world so clearly. And you know just what to do, and just when to do it. Just what you should've done and when you should've done it." The Salton Sea

WHY NOT MAKE A LIST

A friend introduced me to a site that's pretty cool. 43 Things lets you share things you would like to do. It's a cool idea, although I doubt I will do too many of things I've listed. Check it out and, if you start your own list, let me know.

A NEW LOVE

I have a good internet connection, so I thought I'd share what's exciting me right now. Two words...Planet Earth. It is the best thing to watch. The images are amazing. And I have learned so much about this blue orb. It helps put everything into place...all our endless pursuits for success, happiness, wealth. When you see the struggles that so many animals have to suffer daily, you really question the importance we place on such material things. And I call 'happiness' material because, as Americans, we have made it so.
Ironically, I have been reading the cover story of the latest National Geographic. After decades of scientists claiming that animals work only as machines, they are returning to the belief Darwin espoused so long ago, that animals, no matter how simple the creature, are thinking beings. Their emotions may be much simpler, but perhaps that is to an advantage. They are not endlessly worrying about how much money they have, or whether the relationship they're in is good. Their focus is on one thing: survival. The barest of necessities are quite often all they rely on. There are no cell phones, no humvees, no gucci. Just fight or flight. It wasn't too long ago that we existed the same way. Many call it progress, but considering I sell more self-help books than anything else and the sales of anti-depressants are at an all-time high, I beg to differ.
But I digress into yet another rant. And what I really want to do is encourage anyone who may read this to watch this BBC series. I'm even considering buying it because I could watch those images over and over and not tire of them. Please, do yourself a favor and watch it. I will leave you with one of many images I found from the dvd. It is a male bird of paradise displaying for a female and is absolutely beautiful.

A NEW PERSPECTIVE

I know I promised to talk more about synchronicity in my next blog, but random events have made me change direction. ;^)
As readers of this blog have probably discerned, I have been down in the dumps quite often lately. This fact has caused distress which in turn has added to my melancholia. How funny is that? It's all just a vicious cycle. But there is hope, perhaps, on the horizon. I recently found out about a book that may help. Against Happiness is a book that addresses several issues-namely that the pursuit of 'the American dream' (aka happiness) could eventually eradicate melancholia, thereby effecting such things as art, literature, and music. Think about it. What would Van Gogh's art look like if he were happy? Probably lots of fields of big, yellow sunflowers and no starry nights. Would Emily Dickinson have written poetry if she married and had 2.4 children, a house, and a white picket fence?
I have come to the realization that the pursuit of happiness will kill me much sooner than my embracing my sadness. It's not even about finding the little things that make me happy anymore. It has become my need to find more creative releases for the blues that I feel. That's not to say I don't feel at ease sometimes. But focusing on why I was down was consuming me and making me lash out.
The truth I've come to accept is that I can no longer try to make myself happy. The American dream is NOT mine. I don't want children or a husband. I don't care if I own a house or lots of clothes and other stuff. If I'm sad today, that's o.k. If it lasts for a week, so be it. What I want now is to stop dwelling on it and move on.
I'll keep you updated on how this goes. Just know that sometimes this blog may be used as a means of release. If you can stand the rants, read on.

AHHH SYNCHRONICITY...

What a wonderful thing! I have been experiencing, in several different ways, the power of it, so I looked it up on Wikipedia. And I found this entry to be absolutely fascinating. I'd like to share a few favorite quotes and I will explain my recent multiple exposures to the Big S on the next blog.
Enjoy the following and if you have the time, check out the Wikipedia entry and it's many interesting links.

• "Jung coined the word to describe what he called 'temporally coincident occurrences of acausal events.'"
• "One of Jung's favourite quotes on synchronicity was from Through the Looking-Glass by Lewis Carroll, in which the White Queen says to Alice: 'It's a poor sort of memory that only works backwards.'"
• Terence McKenna used the term 'Cosmic giggle' to mean 'a randomly roving zone of synchronicity and statistical anomaly. Should you be caught up in it, it will turn reality on its head. It is objective and subjective, simultaneously "really there" and yet somehow is sustained by imagination and expectation....'"

Ok, I know it's The Police, but I love the lyrics to this song. They're kind of long, but this song paints an interesting portrait of synchronicity:

Synchronicity Ii

Another suburban morning
Grandmother screaming at the wall

We have to shout above the din of our Rice Crispies
We can't hear anything at all
Mother chants her litany of boredom and frustrations
But we know all her suicides are fake

Daddy only stares into the distance
There's only so much more that he can take
Many miles away something crawls from the slime at the
Bottom of a dark Scottish lake

Another industrial ugly morning
The factory belches filth into the sky
He walks unhindered through the picket lines today
He doesn't think to wonder why
The secretaries pout and preen like cheap tarts on a red light street
But all he ever thinks to do is watch
And every single meeting with his so-called superior
Is a humiliating kick in the crotch
Many miles away something crawls to the surface of a dark Scottish lake

Another working day has ended
Only the rush hour hell to face
Packed like lemmings into shiny metal boxes
Contestants in a suicidal race
Daddy grips the wheel and stares alone into the distance
He knows that something somewhere has to break
He sees the family home now looming in the headlights
The pain upstairs that makes his eyeballs ache
Many miles away there's a shadow on the door of a cottage on the
Shore of a dark Scottish lake

IT'S AWARD SEASON!

Yes, it's that time of the year, folks! The Golden Globes, The Oscars, and my favorite awards...the Darwin awards! I had nearly forgot that the 2007 winner have been announced. Without further ado, let's see who was gracious enough to help diminish the number of idiots in the world. Let's meet the runners up:

#5 THE LAPTOP STILL WORKS (Confirmed True by Darwin)
"Driving is not a time to be practicing your multitasking skills," remarked CHP spokesman Tom Marshall, commenting on a 29-year-old computer tutor's decision to drive along Highway 99 in California while working on his laptop. He drifted over the center line, and was killed by oncoming traffic. CHP officers found Oscar's computer still running, plugged into the Honda Accord's cigarette lighter.

#4 SUPERIOR MOMENTUM (Confirmed True by Darwin)
June 2007, Illinois | Two Valparaiso men tested their reflexes by playing "chicken" with a train. Which man could stay on the rail the longest in the path of an oncoming train? At the stroke of midnight, the contest was decided. The winner, aptly named Patrick Stiff, lost his life. The train continued on, as the conductor was unaware that it had hit anyone.

#3 BARN DEMOLITION (Unconfirmed by Darwin)
January 2007, West Virginia) Three friends set out to dismantle a dilapidated barn one bracing winter afternoon. Speaking of bracing... One industrious man fired up his chainsaw and ripped through a crucial support post. Carrying the weight of a full barn roof, those wooden support beams were all that stood between the demolition worker and structural collapse. It was all fun and games until the roof, sans support, succumbed to the pull of gravity and flattened the man with the chainsaw. As a consolation prize, the deceased was indeed successful at demolishing the barn.

(Darwin notes, this story is unconfirmed, but no disputes have come to my attention, as usually happens with bogus stories.)

#2 MOLE HUNT (Confirmed True by Darwin)
January 2007, East Germany | One man's extraordinary effort to eradicate a mole from his property resulted in a victory for the mole. The metal rods he pounded into the ground and connected to a high-voltage power line, electrified the very ground the man stood upon. He was found dead at his holiday property on the Baltic Sea. Police had to trip the main circuit breaker before venturing onto the property.

#1 WHAT GOES UP MUST COME DOWN (Confirmed Double Darwin Award)
June 2007, South Carolina | A passing cabbie found a 21 year-old deceased couple laying naked in the road an hour before sunrise. Authorities were baffled. There were no witnesses, no trace of clothing, and no wrecked vehicles present. But investigators eventually found a clue high on the roof of a nearby building: two sets of neatly folded clothes. Safe sex takes on a whole new meaning when you are perched on the edge of a pyramid-shaped metal roof. "It appears as if [they] accidentally fell off the roof," Sgt. McCants said.

AND THE WINNER IS...

THE ENEMA WITHIN (Confirmed True by Darwin)
May 2004, Texas | Michael was an alcoholic. And not an ordinary alcoholic, but an alcoholic who liked to take his liquor... well, rectally. His wife said he was "addicted to enemas" and often used alcohol in this manner. The result was the same: inebriation. And tonight, Michael was in for one hell of a party.

Two 1.5 litre bottles of sherry, more than 100 fluid ounces, right up the old address!

When the rest of us have had enough, we either stop drinking or pass out. When Michael had had enough (and subsequently passed out) the alcohol remaining in his rectal cavity continued to be absorbed. The next morning, Michael was dead.

The 58-year-old did a pretty good job of embalming himself. Toxicology reports measured his blood alcohol level as 0.47%.

In order to qualify for a Darwin Award, a person must remove himself from the gene pool via an "astounding misapplication of judgment." Three litres of sherry up the butt can only be described as astounding. Unsurprisingly, his neighbors said they were surprised to learn of the incident.

I'd like to point out that it's no surprise to me that half these stories took place in the south.

Now, let's have a moment of silence for all these fine folks who helped to clean up the gene pool.

THE WARRIOR AND THE STALLION

"My uncle once told me about a warrior who had a fine stallion.
Everybody said how lucky he was to have such a horse.
Maybe, he said.
One day the stallion ran off. The people said the warrior was unlucky.
Maybe, he said.
The next day, the stallion returned, leading a string of fine ponies.
The people said it was very lucky.
Maybe, the warrior said.
Later, the warrior's son was thrown from one of the ponies and broke his leg.
The people said it was unlucky.
Maybe, the warrior said.
The next week, the chief led a war party against another tribe. Many young men were killed.
But, because of his broken leg, the warrior's son was left behind, and so was spared."